If you look closely, you can see the book title and the author name.
Thanks to the incredible talents of Philadelphia’s Big Red Tank design studio, the cover for my novel is just about finished. And I couldn’t be happier with the look. The font, the colors, the photography… it’s all just perfect.
I’ve posted the way the book will look with the spine and backcover as well, right after the jump. The designer left plenty of space for the publisher to place the necessary business: barcode, company logo, the book’s summary and author (me!) bio. There’s still some more tinkering to do on their end, but this is what it’ll look like. I’m so excited!
Next up, working on the book’s website and podiobook.
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This weekend, my editor gave me back my manuscript of the novel. And yes, that’s an actual photograph of some edits. I’m fortunate to be working with someone kind and good humored. For every grammatical correction, there was a smiley face and a written laugh near one of my quips. I’m working hard through the end of the month, fixing bits and pieces here, adjusting characters flaws and plots holes there… it’s strange. I thought I was done.
Ah, and then there is her character. The love interest, who I based strongly on my now ex-girlfriend.
How does one make changes? I mean, she effectively ripped my heart out, rolled it around in sea salt, and doused it in delicious buffalo sauce before taking a vicious bite out of it. She may have squeezed a lemon wedge over the exposed, pulsating muscle as well. I couldn’t see. I was too busy trying to make out what sort of buffalo sauce she was using. I hope it was Frank’s. She could have at least done me that honor.
Good humor aside, it’s rough.
I’ll always know that this character I wrote and breathed life into is based on someone I cared about dearly. No one else will know that the wild, free spirited woman in my book is her. The characters look different and don’t share the same name, but it’s the little things. How they both have one off-white tooth. Swear at adorably inappropriate times. Carry themselves with careless grace.
When she first read my novel, she said it was like falling in love with me all over again. Now that I’m editing it, I’m profoundly reminded of why we fell in love in the first place.
So like I said. It’s rough.
It’s easy to edit someone out of a book. It isn’t so easy to edit someone out of your life.
Today at work, I was pleased to find a large box of Quirk Books’ upcoming release, Pride & Prejudice & Zombies: Dawn of the Dreadfuls, waiting for me at my desk. The book doesn’t come out til the end of March. Awesome.
My lovely blog, Geekadelphia, is hosting a Zombieland movie night at The Trocadero here in Philadelphia next Monday, and Quirk was kind enough to donate these books as giveaways / prizes. I’m keeping a copy for myself to review on the blog, of course.
I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t a goal of mine to one day pitch a book to Quirk. I just need to think of that killer, uber-creative idea. I mean, I’m an English professor! This should be easy. Let’s see…
- Oedipus The Bling: A Hip Hop Greek Opera
- Spamlet: A Hamlet Adaptation in the Vein of Monty Python
- Beo-wolf: The Untold Story of Beowulf vs. The Wolfman
- Oliver’s Fist: Oliver Seeks Revenge on Those Who Wronged Him
- The Waist Band: T.S. Eliot’s Guide to Losing Weight & Staying in Shape
Quirk, if you’re interested in these, I have about a dozen more. Let’s talk. I will totally accept hugs, high fives, and a value meal from Wendy’s as my advance.
I guess it’s about time for a monthly update on here. I know, I don’t write on my personal blog nearly enough, mostly due to writing for my job and for my baby, Geekadelphia. That and I’ve been burying my face into anthologies of essays and travel writing.
This semester at MC3 has been fantastic, and teaching at Peirce College has proven to be both incredibly fun and challenging. However, I always find that the textbooks truly lack modern, unique, compelling essays for my kids. As a result, I picked up a lot of the Best American Essays collections, via eBay and Alibris, to hunt down pieces that I know my students will enjoy. Works that will make them see the FUN in reading and writing essays. After-all, there is a reason people adore Sloane Crosley.
I’ve also picked up a wealth of Best American Travel Writing. This month, I sat down to pitch a book idea to a possible publisher, and he/she absolutely loved it. Come Spring-time, I start work on a travel memoir. It’s an exciting time for me, and I’m trying to read as much travel writing as I can. It’s not enough to be excited. I have to be prepared. I’m leaving the details out until I launch the site for the book.
Things are looking up!
Being in love is great. Taking your relationship to the next level, even better. That idea has been on my mind a lot lately, what with several of my close friends getting married and all. However, now that I’ve just completed graduate school, I find that I’m relatively broke, and that funds towards a proper engagement ring are seriously lacking. And despite the fact that I have amazing friends willing to help me out…
letmebeyourwords: Heather wants a yellow diamond.
bordweiser: Well I’ll keep my eyes open for old ladies wearing yellow diamonds who I’d easily be able to mug.
letmebeyourwords: Aw, thanks man.
… I really can’t allow them to go to jail on behalf. So what is a guy in love to do?
Look for engagement ring alternatives, is what. There are plenty of other ring types out there that, in my fine opinion, are just as lovely and meaningful as a piece of gold with a diamond. Let’s take a look.
1. White Castle Chicken Ring – Really, nothing says I love you like a meal from White Castle. After sharing an intimate evening over a Crave Case, surprise her with that hidden sack of White Castle chicken rings you’ve had waiting on the bedside table. Slide the chicken ring onto her ring finger, but be careful! You need to be wary of hot grease. Burning your lover’s finger will certainly ruin this otherwise beautiful moment.
For added effect, eat the chicken rings with your lover, and save the last one for the special proposal. Both the act of proposing AND the act of saving the last chicken ring for her… well, let’s just say that will certainly seal the deal.
2. Telephone Ring – The art of the telephone ring proposal is truly a practice in knowing your partner. There is no physical exchange of a tangible object, just the presentation of a sound clip, about 30 seconds long, emitted from your cell phone. Be sure to download a proper ring-tone that will really express how you feel.
Recommendations include Crank Dat by Soulja Boy and Face Down Ass Up by 2 Live Crew. These heartbreakingly romantic ballads will surely win over your lover as the chorus repeats again and again from your Razr.
3. Halo Ring - The video game Halo features a giant ring floating in space that can destroy the entire universe and effectively end all life in the solar system. Explain this to her as you propose, noting that you’ll be happy to have her destroy your life anytime. Swoons are guaranteed. That not working for you? My friend in interweb blogging, Hawty McBloggy, has a handy list of Halo proposal readily available. Smash Bros Brawl also works, but loses the whole RING image.
You can also spell out your proposal using guns and weaponry inside the video game if you have the time.
4. Wrestling Ring – It is every woman’s dream to have their man dress like Nacho Libre and wrestle them down into a life long commitment. Just look at the hot nun from the film. Eyes open, mouth agape… that girl was all about it at the end. Finding a mask at your local costume shop (some here in Philly specialize in luchador masks) shouldn’t be too hard. After-all, it needs to be just right.
In addition, you’ll be blessed with loveable fat children, much like the orphans at Nacho’s commune.
5. Lord of the Ring(s) – One ring to rule them all,one ring to find them, one ring to bring them all, and in the darkness bind them. Whisper these sweet words into your beloveds ear while handing her a sealed copy of The Fellowship of the Ring on DVD, preferably the four disc box set, because well, you love this girl, and a proposal is a serious matter.
Bonus points if you dress up like Ian McKellen as Gandalf.
… well, that’s all I’ve got. Any ring suggestions from you guys? Let’s hear ‘em.
So I’ve been working on my book for two years now. It’s done, but right now I’m editing it, adding pieces here and there, really trying to flesh out some of the more shallow points in the story. I’m also working on creating a better ending. I recently caved and let a few friends (thanks Glen & Helen!) read it, and I’ve been getting some positive feedback.
However, I just caught this.
Here’s the scene towards the end of the book. One of the main characters, the love interest, Hannah, is leaving to go back home to her beloved state. The lead character chases after her bus, yelling for her not to leave in a super cute and highly (but purposely) cliche moment. He screams.
“Don’t go back to Montana, Hannah!”
… FUCK!
Seriously, did I really go two years working on this story, and not realize this?
Alexis: “find–>replace
You sure said it Lexie.
I had a bit of a freak out last night. While doing homework, I let Mittens run around my room. If he isn’t let out for at least an hour a day, he starts to cry inside his cage (it sounds like a puppy), and will do so most of the night. So, with his door open, he scampered up my arm and jumped onto the floor, running about like crazy.
I typed away furiously on my Powerbook while Family Guy played in the background. I like to laugh while writing and studying, it keeps my spirits up. Suddenly, I realized that nearly two hours had gone by, due to the fact that disc one of the season I was watching was over. I started to look around my room. Where was Mittens?
I looked all around the house. Mittens had once before climbed the steps from my downstairs bedroom, and spent his playtime causing havoc in the living room / kitchen, but he was nowhere to be found.
Finally, I discovered him in my bathroom, sitting on top of the towel rack, fast asleep against the wall. How he got up there in the first place, I’m not quite sure. Maybe he climbed up the towels, or jumped off the toilet. Whatever the case was, he woke up when I walked in, climbed onto my shoulder, and went back to sleep inside his cage.
Silly Mittens. You are so adorables.
So my first year of graduate school is officially over. I’ve managed not to fail out despite uprooting myself to a new city, moving three times in the span of four months, going on a tour, and working a full time job. Surprisingly, my girlfriend hasn’t broken up with me yet.
Just one more semester and a summer class, and I’m finished. I can’t wait. Then maybe it’ll be time for a break from school before I start my PhD in English. I’ve been in classrooms non-stop since I was… what, 10? When do kids go to kindergarten? At 25, I’m ready to take a break from those uncomfortable desks.
Right now, I’m ready to spend a week playing XBox 360 (I need to beat Just Cause), watching South Park episodes, eating bad food, and then cutting lose with my family and close friends in New Jersey this weekend. Christmas holiday mixtape to follow shortly.
And yes, admire my Photoshop skills with that LOLbunny I just made. Ashlee goes to the vet again in January to get fixed and have some blood work done (she has some swollen glands, poor thing), and Mittens the chinchilla has his first visit in February. My babies are growing up!
My debut novel comes out this Fall. You'll be able to download free audiobook podcasts 
